Archive for the ‘Lady Half Breed Speaks’ Category

Lady Halfbreed “Was There” Too.

September 22, 2007

 

The midwest has some lovely qualities to it. For one, you can actually see the stars at night. People are generally more down-to-earth and thankfully, a great deal less selfish. Oh and most importantly, summer in the city doesn’t smell like yesterday’s vomit. But I guess that where the fun ends.

Under the “this shit sucks list”, well, it’s the midwest. No tour ever really stops here. Chicago maybe, but lest you forget Detroit is the bastard child of the entire country. We’re on the same caliber as Balitmore, just slightly less hood, so I’m forced to wait for months upon months for a band that I am remotely interested in to grace us with their presence. That or drive the 6 hours it takes to get to Chi-Town. Either way, my response is boo.

Thankfully, Bonde Do Role came thru this past Thursday and let’s be honest, I might as well have been a pre-pubescent teenager at an Akon concert. I completely lost my mind.  

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Taste The Rainbow

September 22, 2007

I used to wonder how Diddy could possibly fit in the closet? What, with all his velour Sean John jumpsuits and ghetto fabulous three piece ensembles? But then I saw this.

Guess he found a way.

Only next time I’d like to see him make it more believable. Shit, even those of us with mild retardation and snow blindness can see the gay just oozing out. To quote my damn self, he’s coming at you with a double sided dildo and some AIDS in his pocket so you better watch out. Plus, that shit probably smells like pine corns and dookie butter. No thank you Ms. Diddy. Try again.

And Speaking Of Hipster…

September 6, 2007

We have A Brooklyn Life to thank for this. Well, them and whoever made this in the first place. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Hipster Olympics.

Awesome.

Maybe Your Head Is MisShapen

September 6, 2007

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Once the quintessence of cool, those pouty trendsetters known to Downtown Manhanttanites as the MisShapes have been making dimly lit dive bars sway since before they became the inspiration of every fashion designer this side of the Billy Burg Bridge. Still, with a new coffee table book (um, accessory?) of their seemingly closest friends and an ever-growing ego that’s becoming increasingly hard to stomach, I can’t help but think that their parties aren’t the only thing becoming lackluster about the MisShapes.

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How To Blog On CP Time

September 6, 2007

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Or colored people time for all our pale skinned friends out there.

I know my black ass is days late talkin about this, but I could really care less. I had a horrible holiday and it ain’t a coincindence. Why? Becase Labor Day is the absolute worst holiday in existence. Seriously. And it’s time for me to learn you why.

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Guest Blogger: Lady Half-Breed

August 30, 2007

 

Allo, allo, allo.

So who’s a lazy ho? …I’m a lazy ho.

I’ve had a whirlwind schedule lately, what with picking my nose and wiping the goobers on my wall after sharecropping all day. So my partner in all things fool is going to pitch in with her takes on life’s little foibles.

Presenting Lady Half-Breed!!

A few things:

 Lady Half-Breed’s mother is Kansas while her dad is from the Congo.

…Which brings us to point number 2: Lady Half-Breed is a tragic mulatto.

Homegirl is blogging from Detroit. Big up the midwest. Woop woop.

Remember all those posts when I was puking Sparks outside some starlet’s release party in NYC’s MPD? She had everything to do with that.

Her acid tongue sometimes makes me blush. So her writing will likely make your head explode. With goodness.

Have fucking fun!