Conny’s Alive!!


Oh my goodness children many, many, many apologies for being so derelict. I got so many yarns to spin, y’all besta just sit down hush yo’ pie hole for a few.

 So just a brief run-down as to what I’ve been up to:

I Was There…

Turntables On The Hudson at Hudson Hotel – Man if those chillun’ didn’t straight up kill it, what with the live drumming and bringing out the ethnicks to typically uber-douchebaggy Hudson Bar.


Puerto Rican Day Parade – Y’all may not have a real country but damn y’all made 5th ave look El Barrio with piles of dollar flags and gold plated plastic jewelry littering the upper east side. Bless them. And who showed up on a giant sequined arepa but the most Puerto Rican ho of them all, EVE!! Yes, I didn’t know what was going on either but I guess you got a track where you’re wearing unnecessarily tight stretch pants in the video, better go market to the hispanics.

And America’s Next Top Rock Ho Jaslene showed up with her man-lookin’ ass. Ho showed up on the only float playing latin house, complete with some broke ass voguers and her ribs protruding from her Mandee polyester halter. I’m suprised she didn’t have heroin needles swinging from her earlobes as crackity as she looked.

Roller Skating at Studio B – Ok kids, you know I’m an old guard Studio 54 queen at heart (curses, I just haaaad to be born in the 80s. Couldn’t my parents be more slutty and pop me out in the 70s? Hoes) so roller-skating and disco is my idea of heaven. HEAVEN I TELL YOU HEAVEN!!! After I went dancing to some foully good Baltimore club at the Natural History Museum (apparently, the Planetarium is that crack) I showed up in these rowdy pink jeans (hyphy salmon as DJ Lu Lu would say) and I was workin’ it out to everything from the Bar Keys to Detroit Tech. Chile, you ain’t lived till you’ve rollerskated on the Sparks to “Ass and Titties” ducking puddles of miscellaneous spilled liquor. Pics of the foolishness estan aqui.

Deemi, Jaguar Wright and Tank Showcase – So, as usual I can’t take industry splaboos in large doses so I ducked in for a minute just to catch Deemi rocking the stage like somebody’s hood-ass aunt at the cookout who had too many Mystic wine coolers and is now bustin’ out “His Eye Is On The Sparrow.” She was good though, just you know, hood.

These are just some highlights (basically, some of the few things I remember) of the past two weeks in addition to busting out my Afro and having my down-ass girl bring her fabulousness from San Fran.

Ok, so I’m back to blogging so y’all bitches better stay prayed up…


One Response to “Conny’s Alive!!”

  1. Lady Half Breed Says:

    Oh Jesus girl, you have me in stiches.

    Baltimore club at the Natural History Museum? Rolling skating on the Sparks to “Ass In Titties”? Wearing “hyphy salmon” jeans?

    Girl, I can’t take it. That is amazing.

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